I'm Not Ready

Casey is going to propose next fall ... He has my ring picked out and everything. He didn't have to (I didn't ask), but he told me what it looks like, and it's perfect. Absolutely everything I want. He's really good to me.

But I'm not ready.

I'm selfish...petty......defensive...irrational...how could I think I'm ready to put someone else above myself all the time? I want to. More than anything. I love him. I'm excited about spending the rest of our lives together. I just don't think I'm capable of being able to constantly be as good to him as he is to me. He's so amazing. He's sweet and kind and caring and he loves me. He puts others before himself. Namely, me. I don't think it's possible for me to be as wonderful to him as he is to me. As hard as I try. How could I be ready to do that for the rest of our lives? But I still want to. I want to marry him. Tomorrow if I could. I'm just so unsure of my own temperament and abilities. I couldn't find a man better than Casey. I don't know why I'm so blessed and lucky.